All I remember is waking up in the hospital…
I had these suction cup thingies near my nips hee hee.
The T.V. was on. There was another little boy in the bed hospital bed next to me.
We acknowledged each other and started watching cartoons together and laughing.
Funny how you can feel like any other kid is your new best friend when you’re a child.
I was confused as to why I was there, but then…I really couldn’t give two shits when they brought ice cream into the room.
The details are fuzzy as this was roughly 26 years ago.
My brothers and sisters filled in the missing gaps when they came back into the room when I was awake and coherent. Apparently, I’d been hit by a van. I didn’t remember shit since I was knocked out cold.
Hee hee, my siblings swear that I flew 20 feet or some shit like that.
God I hope that’s true. Pretty awesome.
You see, we lived near a high school, 2nd to last house from the main road that leads to North Side High School. This dude rounded the corner as my Grandma was walking us to school and I was lagging behind lost in my 8-year old boy thoughts.
I don’t know who told me or insinuated this…
But my belief is that the man who hit me with the van was a little distracted by the High School girls going to school.
And THAT’S what led to me doing my best Superman impression for a very short while followed by an involuntary “planking” into the cement.
I even remember the dude visiting me and saying he was gonna pay for any bills and whatnot.
That dude disappeared faster than a hippie during the draft back in 69′ (I had to look that up to be honest hee hee).
So here was the damage:
No broken bones.
Just a really f**king cool story to tell every other 8-year old when I got back to school and the scars to boot.
Phillip Lopez: The Boy Who Really Lived bahahahahaha
Be grateful guys.
Not everyone escapes death, paralysis etc.
I’m grateful for every day on this Earth, even if I get a little pissy at times lol.
Stop complaining about the trivial shit my friend. If you can walk, talk, heck f**king breathe normally…
YOU HAVE AN ADVANTAGE.
Less complaining, more do-something-about-it.
That is all.
Please like, comment & share this if you found it amusing an any way.
~ Uncle Phil
Ahh…the dreaded “Shiny Object Syndrome“.
What a beeatch eh?
Everyone has had it in the past (I’m about 99.999999…% sure of this) or they still have it (I know I do from time to time who am I kitten?).
But what drives it?
You don?t WANT to buy over and over and over again.
But you do.
It’s like these guys know what they’re doing with their sexy sales pages, pain points, etc. lol.
Here’s what I think/KNOW is going on (from personal experience & observation):
You lack a clear plan or a purpose young Skywalker.
AND your body/mind need one in order to operate most successfully.
So when you don?t have one, and your body/mind need one…
Then it looks for the first thing you can do that makes you feel productive.
That may come in the form of checking your email often, spending copious amounts of time on Facebook being unproductive, OR of course…buying up a new shiny object.
Think about it.
This is kinda like when a retired person wakes up with nothing to do.
Maybe he watches a couple o’ hours of news, heads over to to his local diner/pub/whatever and gives his “views on the news” with the locals for the next few hours. It makes him feel like he’s important and like he’s been productive in some way.
One more example is perhaps when you know someone who doesn’t have a job (or you may have been/currently are this person, I’ll admit that I have in the past) and then spends…Oh I don’t know, maybe 30-45 minutes per day “hunting” for a job so they can say that they really tried hard and that hey…“Nobody’s hiring!”.
This reminds me of a saying in Spanish that goes:
“Estan buscando jale pidiendole a Dios no encontrar.”
Translation: “They’re looking for work begging God to NOT find any.”
This is pretty much a self-preservation kinda thing.
You see it’s hard for people to admit that they currently suck (put that one on a quilt hee hee), and maybe they’re really looking to coast for a bit and don’t wanna admit that.
I could ramble on and on about this, but you’re a smart cookie…methinks you gets the point.
So let’s get back to you, les entrepreneur extraordinaire.
You NEED to feel validated in your work holmes, but if you lack a plan/purpose…then you’ll fall back into checking your email, or Facebook, and buying up every digital product up under the Tuscan sun.
Or something like that.
So without further adios, here are the steps I think you can take to murder the shit out of your Shiny Object Syndrome:
I’m sorry for virtually yelling, but I had to get my point across and I just drank a Diet Coke so things are getting a lil’ crazy here in the Lopez household.
This…makes sense right?
In fact, you’re probably thinking to yourself something like: “Man, this SEEMS like common sense, and boy is that Phil smart/handsome!”
Right-e-o on both accounts my dear Watson.
You see, you’ll start feeling validated once you get this shit done for the day and you won’t even feel the NEED to open up your email, Facebook, and maybe…the urge to buy new shiny objects will lessen (I’ll admit that I still get my urges, I wanted to buy something last night because of scarcity and the fact that I can probably make some quick moolah with it).
Next, you’re gonna only be using email (get this…) when you ACTUALLY need to use it. The same goes for Facebook, you only get on there when you ACTUALLY need to connect with people, and you ONLY buy something new when you ACTUALLY need to or the software/training will exponentially help automate a part of your business so you can have more time, save Mary Jane, take the gun leave the cannoli, and save 15% on your car insurance!!
Damn, got lost again but I think you catch my drift 🙂
DON’T buy shit that says something like “You NEED to buy this OR you will fail.”
That’s utter and complete horse poop, STOP being scared into buying stuff!
Now the plan of attack is to just simply execute your rock-solid plan every stinkin’ day, and all the other crap won’t seem as important as it was before because you’ll be too damn busy being super freakin’ productive.
Think about it.
It’s kinda like when you watch a TV show at a certain time, let’s say 5:30pm (I used to watch Jeopardy with my pops & siblings and we’d battle at who could get the most answers right…NERDS!).
These people (I mean WE) are addicted.
So what’s easier?
Learning the art of self-discipline OR just filling that schedule up with something else?
You know the answer Daniel-San.
Same thing goes for your business playa.
Bet ya just went from “Aha…” to “Oh sheeeeeat! Phil’s droppin’ some knowledge bombs!”
I want to thank you for joining me here today.
And hey, if you’d like some more knowledge bombs, make sure and pick up my free training Zero To Hero In 30 Days below.
Don?t network at all.
Use email swipes EVERY TIME.
Ignore video marketing.
Don?t build a list.
ONLY be in it for the money.
Check your email often.
Read 50,000 books without implementing shit.
Don?t niche it down.
Drop your affiliate links into a Facebook group as soon as you get in.
Forget about value, focus on just quantity.
Copywriting is overrated, just do good enough.
Don?t ask questions.
Ignore your EXISTING customers.
Trust is overrated, start sending people to offers whether you?ve built up trust with them or not.
Ignore Facebook marketing, people are only there to make friends.
The money is NOT in the list, so don?t worry about building one.
SEO is the most important thing in the world.
Social media marketing is just a ?fad?.
Investing is optional, only invest in FREE methods.
Buy products, implement just a little. If it doesn?t work, buy something else related. Then rinse & repeat.
Don?t show your face.
Use robotic voices in your sales letters.
Reciprocate offers blindly, besides...they did you a favor right?
Cater to every one of your customer?s needs.
Don?t worry about having a good headline.
Focus on perfection before launching a product.
Don?t launch products, just focus on affiliate marketing.
$7 WSOs are the only way to go.
Jv Zoo, Warrior Plus, and Click Bank are the only way to go.
Keep all of your money in your PayPal account.
Don?t get a coach.
Get a coach but don?t do your homework on them.
Don?t create everyday.
Don?t focus on public speaking.
ONLY use solo ads to build your list.
Learn linearly, not holistically.
Good grammerr is overated.
Good grammar is EVERYTHING.
Join 3,000 FB groups.
Friend everyone that friends you on FB.
Let anyone into your Facebook group.
Don?t re-purpose information you?ve already created.
Don?t update existing products to make them better.
Don?t create assets as often as you can.
Spam JV Facebook groups whenever you launch. People LOVE this.
Don?t workout , body & mind connection? Give me a f**kin? break!
Get into Facebook wars with people, they?re productive.
You have to be everywhere, ignore what?s working the best.
You only have to be in one place. Make sure and put all your internet marketing eggs in that basket. What could possibly change?
Ignore your significant other, this is much more IMPORTANT.
Never over-deliver, you don't wanna set the bar too high.
Don't use humor.
Don't use irony.
Don't use scarcity.
Don't mix it up, make sure people know what they'll get EVERY TIME.
Mix it up and confuse the sh*t out of your leads & customers.
Don't add to this list, it's stupid.
DON'T take this with a grain of salt, this is SUPER cereal.
Thanks for checking out this lil' checklist on how to fall flat on your face with internet marketing. If you have any additional can't-win strategies to add, feel free to comment below!
Click the button below to download this checklist!
Man…I was just rereading what’s arguably my favorite blog post EVER by James Altucher.
It’s called The Ultimate Guide for Becoming an Idea Machine and it’s an A to S guide on how he does this (I’m completely serious lol). The thing is that we tell ourselves that we want something, but we’re just NOT fed up enough to do something about it. Reminds me of a video I referenced in this guest blog post I did where I was talking about how to kill your inner wantrepreneur.
To quickly summarize: It’s a scene in the movie Fight Club where Brad Pitt puts a gun to a store clerk’s head and pretty much tells him that if he doesn’t follow his dreams…
Well, he’ll come back and waste the f**cker. Here’s the scene if you didn’t click that link up there:
I can tell you right now that if you still haven’t started doing what you say you wanna do… Then it’s because you’re not out of your comfort zone.
Why do you think you hear about rags to riches stories? A few examples:
And just to add a lil’ illustration….eventually these people were like:
I thinks you gets the points.
So I remember being in college (better yet taking online college classes lol). I’d procrastinate like I’d never procrastinated before.
Deadline looming right?
But then Netflix beckons you and then it’s like…
“Jeepers Phil, are you STALKING me?!” You utter.
Who the heck says jeepers…anyhoo, the answer is no not yet because I don’t have your address.
Just stay on this blog post for 10 more seconds and I can triangulate on your location 🙂
Then it’s this hee hee:
Oops, I mean “What’s stalking?”
Sorry, I got sidetracked.
El point-o is that well come deadline day, guess who hasn’t done shit? This guy right here…GULP!
But you know what?
When I had no other choice but to friggin’ do it…
I was more focused on my time and judged my work less.
See the reason I wasn’t able to meet the deadline is because I would start doing my assignments/discussions or whatever the crap earlier in the week…but then I’d get into a perfectionist mindset and that went nowhere except Netflixville lol.
Sometimes stress can help.
Ok, so it looks like I’ve Tarantino-ed this post lol.
Let’s get back to stretching you idea muscle.
I know that a lot of you won’t be reading that long blog post by Se?or Altucher so I’m gonna give you the TL/DR or better yet the Cliff’s Notes version.
Hee hee, even more better-er yet Phil’s Notes.
Maybe that can be a phrase now bahaha.
“Let me Phil’s Notes that for ya.”
In other words, I’ll read it and find an amusing yet vile way to present it to you.
Anyhoo, where were we?
Ah yes, the Phil’s Notes/TL/DR version of how to stretch your idea muscle.
So the thing is coming up with 10 ideas per day.
“Why 10 Phil?”. You ask.
The number is really just arbitrary, it can be 20, or a 100.
But people love the number 10 so it’s a good place to start because 20 or 100 can be pretty daunting.
Something to think about: If you can come up with 10 ideas every day for the next year (or just in one day or week really), then you’re bound to come up with at least 1 good one right?
It doesn’t have to be something business-related.
In fact, it can be ridiculous.
The important thing is just stretching that idea muscle so often that coming up with ideas becomes second nature to you.
So come up with business ideas…
For Uber or Lyft.
For a phone sex line lol.
It doesn’t matter, have fun with this!
There’s one major thing in James’ blog post that really struck a chord with me.
It’s where he talks about giving ideas away for free.
Stay away from thinking that you need to charge people for additional ideas.
This is so damn good I have to quote directly:
When you come up with ideas for someone else, always give ALL the ideas away for free if you think they are good ideas (remember: six months). I read recently one person said to give HALF of your ideas away for free and make them pay for the other half. This is very bad. This guarantees you will only come up with bad ideas. Because you will hoard your ideas. You will develop a SCARCITY COMPLEX around your ideas. Ideas are infinite. But once you define your capacity of good ideas (?half?) then they instantly become finite for you. Not for anyone else. But just for you, your ideas will be finite. If you stick to an abundance mentality, and be grateful for the ideas that are flowing through you, then they will be infinite. Where they come from, nobody knows. But they will be infinite and lucrative for you. So give ideas for free, and then when you meet, give more ideas. And if someone wants to pay you and your gut feels this is a good fit, then give even more ideas. ~ James Altucher
Pretty freakin’ cool right?
Eventually, people may pay you for being an idea machine.
Oh, so I also want to tell you about these waiter’s pads James mentions.
They’re easy to jot ideas down on and they fit right in your back pocket. Now I haven’t bought these myself, I’ve had little notebooks that I’ve used before.
I think this is great because I’ve been finding that I value ideas I write down MORE than ideas I just type.
Use either one, but the thing is just making these lists of ideas.
So we’ve come to the end of this lil’ blog post of mine.
To recap quickly, here are a couple o’ things that will help you stretch your idea muscle:
I really hope this helps.
Coming up with ideas often will eventually lead to you becoming somewhat of an expert, even if it’s just at coming up with ideas lol.
So just to help out, here are 10 ideas on how to get your first sale online if you’ve never made one before. Some will suck, some will not:
I truly hope you got something out of this blog post.
If you did, just shoot me a comment below.
I’ve also got a cool Facebook group here with some awesome peeps.
Thanks for reading.
~ Uncle Phil